Letter to my friend

Dear L,

Well, we are not in the quake zone so I'm fine. Thanks.

I think you have too many new things/changes going on in your life.
Stress builds up.

It's probably like when I just got here a year ago, and even just 2 months back. There were too many things going on at the same time in my life. So I sort of broke down.
But you can come back too, just know what is it you want.
If you don't.At least you know. And you can start searching for it.
I'm feeling better after visiting my prof, he sort of helped me helped myself understand more of everything.

It is about myself being happy. And not conforming to social standards / comparing with other people. Sometimes in life, there's so much you want to do but only so much you can do. I guess we can only try to work towards that goal little by little. And understand that we may still never reach it.

I had a chat with a friend yesterday. 2 friends actually, both in Tokyo. The first one, WF, called me up and chatted for an hour maybe. She's thinking of returning to Beijing. She wants to work in a trading company I think, to start as an assistant manager and then work her way up. That's good. She knows what she wants. And she advised me to get some qualifications here while I have the time. These Qs will help me in my career, she said.

Hmmm... I'm not very interested actually. I'm not her. I don't think I'll be happy doing that.
I think she is more frustrated over her love life. I should not put up her story for all to see. Oh Rui is also agonizing over hers, me? Haha, any takers? :p

You love him enough to have married him. Trust your instinct.
I admit that I am a coward. I am afraid of rejection. Breaking up.
I can't imagine getting married actually. You must have had a lot of courage.
It's commitment phobia. Hahaha, I sound like a guy.
Deep down I do want to. Maybe it's the timing.

2nd friend finally had closure from her past 'failures'. I think we are sort of becoming similar. I think we will become happier. :)

Love,
fish

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I was typing halfway when I felt that this mail is going to become very long.
Therefore, I decided to blog it since you are free to access it now.