Life Mentor

I spent 5 days 4 nights at my professor's place after a 1 week interpretation training.
A long time. He was my thesis supervisor in university.
And actually, I haven't really spoken to him about things other than school work.
But somehow I kept in contact with him via the occasional email all this while.
Then I got sick and decided to visit everyone I know before I die.
Yeah, I was pretty extreme.

I haven't seen him for more than 2 years. Was actually a little worried when I was in the train bounded for his place.
Then I called him on my phone and his voice sort of put me at peace :)
I didn't know why I had the urgh to visit him. It's instinct.
And I'm very glad I did.

I knew I wanted to talk. But I couldn't open up at first.
He knew, his wife knew too. And they were very patient with me.
Over the weekends, we went sightseeing. Rode on a riverboat to see the red autumn leaves.
Went to see the remains of the very old houses the Japanese used to live in 2 hundred years ago.
They were really patient.

Every night, well except for Monday, we drank quite a bit.
I didn't realise he like drinking, and so did his wife.
Good thing I like it too. :)
So I guess I let it out bit by bit. And tears flowed sometimes, at the table, in the car, in the house...
I think they realised, at least the time at the table over drinks.

They told me about themselves, what they felt, basically I think they let me think for myself.
I can't remember all they said, nor the exact words, but something like these...

'見つけるかもしれないけど、そのまま死んでゆく可能性もある。’
’もし世間の基準だけだとちょっと残念です。’
’先に言っとく、どっちにしても後悔するから。’
’あること年取ってから分かる。’
’今こんな年になって、ま、こんなもんだな。’
’やりたいことはまだやってないけど、ちょっとずつやっていく。’
’ほかの同じ年の人と違うけど、結局自分は不幸じゃないと思う。’
’僕のことを羨ましいと思われてる人もいる。’
’すっと言いたかったけど、分からないと思う。私とともこと同じく恵まれてる、すごいいい耳もってるから、才能あるよ。’
’ユイとしゃべる時に日本人と同じようにしゃべってるから、外国人のように考えってない。’
’博士もユイのようにできないから。’
'吸収したものをまとめて、どこか出す。’
’自分ができることをまだ全部使ってない。’
’自分ができることを増やしてそれから選択が増える。’
’あなたができることほかの人ができない。’
’あなたが持ってるものを生かして’
’自分を大事にしてね。’

He said I was very similiar to his wife. I think he meant character wise, and maybe my situation and a lot, which I realised later on.
He watched and told me things I didn't know about myself.
I think he helped me on the path to self-discovery.
His last advice to me really struck my heart.
Nobody has ever said that to me. Not even my mum.

I got on the train and kept sobbing along the way.
On the bus, on the plane, then another bus and a tram.
Everyone must have thought that I ran away from home since I was lugging a suitcase.

I may never see him again, but I will always remember him.
Oh dear I'm still crying now.

ありがとう